The Trying Times

Okay, I don't care who you are or what you believe ..... there comes a time in every person's life where you need to admit that knowing your herbs and their uses is a very good thing! Some people buy things just for the way they smell or taste, but knowing the functions of these things is definitely a plus some days. Take today for instance....

Living in Arizona has so many pluses and a few draw backs. The one drawback is that it is very dry so everything in it is very dry including your skin. Easy fix to that, you have lotion in every room of the house. You apply it to your body after showering, to your hands after washing them, or doing dishes, and several other times throughout the day as you feel you need to use it. Really, very easy fix.

Now, some people buy lotions purely for the smell or the lack of oily feel or the easy absorption... various reasons. I buy most lotions for the way they are absorbed, but I have been on this kick lately for buying lavender lotion. I love the way lavender smells and I love the soothing affect that it has. With a trying 3 yr old this is a wonderful quality to have subtly around the house at various times of the day every day. Trust me. You will understand by the time I am through here.

My daughter whom I lovingly refer to as the Monster Princess, or MP for short has recently turned 3yrs old. There is a reason that the 3rd year has been referred to by many psychologists and pediatricians not to mention parents alike as the 'Trying Threes'. This is a year where your child will 'try' everything! And a multitude of times. Including your patience! Today was really the first adventure in 'trying' more than just pushing boundaries for my husband and I with this child. Mind you, we have 6 other children but the one closest in age is already 18 and enrolled to begin college in the fall, so this is as good as never having been here before since it has been so long ago. There is definitely truth to the saying that your mind forgets that which was traumatic or truly horrible. This all being said, let me tell you what our last hour was like here in my home.

We had just finished eating our lunch outside on the patio. The weather was a beautiful 80 degrees with a nice breeze blowing. Really very comfortable and relaxing. I came into the house to use the bathroom.  In the 5 minutes of peace that I had to myself, I should have known that I would come out to a nightmare! I mean really, when do I EVER get to pee alone? I have a 3yr old after all.

My husband was out on the patio with our daughter, or so I thought. Silence was heavenly. I was SO WRONG! I should have listened to the warning bells going off in my head and hurried myself through my visit to the bathroom like any other time. As I am washing my hands and looking for the lotion it occurs to me at the same moment I hear my husband's voice asking my daughter, "What have you gotten into?" That the lotion was moved out of that bathroom because she kept getting into it. So I dried my hands and went out into the living room where I saw the dog and the cat both lying right against the wall as if they were waiting for me, so they could tell on someone. I smell lavender. I hear my husband still talking to our daughter, "Brooklynn," he says, "You really do know better than this." Of course the MP says nothing. As I come past the animals, I notice they are not just waiting for me to get out of the bathroom, they are 'hiding' from the 3yr old. I continue through the living room into the den and see my husband wiping of the MP's hands and she has a huge glop of lotion on her chin. Thinking to myself, "This explains why I smell lavender." The lightbulb comes on above my head at this moment.

The dog is COVERED in lotion. From the top of her head, down her back and all over her one side. She was definitely 'rubbed down' with lotion. The cat had lotion on her hind quarters, but I think only because she wouldn't stand still long enough for the MP to coat her as well. There is lotion on the carpet in the living room and there is lotion all over all the handles and doors to the china cabinet. My husband is diligently cleaning up the MP and keeps muttering things like, "I just can't believe you did this." "You know you aren't supposed to climb on things." "You could have fallen and really gotten hurt." While I am impressed with the patience he is showing it reminds me that it IS only lotion so how bad can it be right? I mean after all, I have the worst of it right here. He caught her in the act and cleaned her up first. Right?? I would have. RIGHT??

As I proceeded into the kitchen to get wipes to clean up the china cabinet (the animals were going to need baths, no doubt about that) and the carpet, I passed through the den where my husband is doing what I can only describe as turtle waxing the television screen. He had already cleaned up the top of the entertainment center (which is where the lotion from the bathroom had been put) and was now cleaning up the television screen that our daughter had finger painted with half a bottle of purple lotion. The house smells fantastic by the way!

I proceed into the kitchen and see that the large 'economy' sized bottle that I just bought 2  days ago is more than a quarter gone. My microwave is covered in purple slime and the counter top looks as though someone frosted it like a cake. Thickly spread and smeared everywhere. The cabinets in front of the sink were slathered and my husband is saying that the couches and the tables in the den were coated as well. At this point, MP is beginning to realize that as my husband and I are quietly and calmly cleaning like mechanical versions of her parents, she should be worried.

"Sorry, Daddy." "I didn't mean to do it."  comes out of her little mouth.
"Oh, Im sure the only thing you didn't mean was to get caught," her Daddy calmly replied.

At this point Daddy and Mommy are standing side by side at the kitchen sink respectively cleaning off lotion bottles. Daddy the one from the living room and Mommy, the one from the kitchen.
MP hugs my leg and says, "Sorry, Mom". I looked down and said, "Brooklynn, you know you aren't supposed to climb on things and you KNOW you are not supposed to play in the lotion".

This is where my husband looks at me with a grin and says, "Well at least the TV is going to smell good for a long time". I laughed and said, "Yeah, so is the dog!"

Poor dog. She is still covered in greasy purple goop. She is just laying at my feet with that look on her face that says, "PLEASE MOM!! Just don't let her touch me any more!"

After my husband and I had calmly and rather efficiently cleaned up all the messes that we found, we tucked the Monster (not a Princess at that moment) in for her nap and plopped ourselves on the loveseat. Side by side both of us quietly laughing at this ordeal and commenting on how the good thing is...

"The good thing is," he said, "at least it smells good".
"The good thing is," I replied, "I know what lavender is for and have that all through the house instead of something like eucalyptus!" We both laughed at that and agreed that something that would invigorate her was NOT the best scent to have in the home of a 3yr old.

My husband looked over at the dog, who is still cowering beside me no matter where I go and said "Poor Anthrax. She just laid there and took it".  I agreed. "Poor Anthrax. She was trying to eat her lunch and the MP cornered her and slathered her down. The poor dog never even finished her food".

Now that everything is cleaned up and my husband and I made it through that ordeal calmly and comically, we are complimenting each other on how well we kept our cool and how funny this all really was. After all, it was only lotion. No one and no animals were hurt in the execution of this stunt. And last but not least, we proved to each other again, that even after 10 years, 7 children, and various grandchildren, we really do work together well when we need to. Once again we were reminded that we do come together in times of adversity and that we definitely compliment each other in trying times.

The trying times..... Sounds like a good title for a book. (Well, at least for this blog post!)

Why just get wet?

It seems to me that sometimes people just can not be true to themselves. Sometimes people talk the talk but they can not back it up. I have worked long and hard to repair myself. I know there is a lot of work left but I am after all, a work in progress. As I progress on my path of self reflection and personal growth, I am learning more about others than I ever thought or intended I would. It isnt that I am really 'trying' to learn about others but when you are learning about yourself, you can not help but learn about others as well.

I did not start out to be one of those people that spread blessings on everyone else and was always cheerful and happy. When I was a child, a person that was so happy and so generous was someone that put me on my guard instantly. I thought it was 'abnormal' for someone to be so peaceful and happy all the time and in my life, I suppose it was. What I have learned along the way is that it is only abnormal to those who do not look for the silver lining. It is only abnormal for those so filled with negativity that so much positive energy felt uncomfortable.

I have been learning to let go. An odd way of seeing things when what I want is to obtain something. I have learned that in order for the good things to come into your life, you have to be willing to let other things go in order to have room for those good things to come in to. I have also been learning that you can not just let anything go. You have to be sure that anything you are setting down and walking away from, has been properly diffused. After carrying all that negative energy around for so long, to just let it loose into the universe is like sending out time released capsules of bad juju. Seriously. You know how toxic that stuff was while you held it in, why in the world would you just toss it to the wind? Make sure that you examine everything that you are leaving behind and that you have neutralized it and grounded it before you let it go.

This takes a lot of work. You really have to go through all of your personal memories, good, bad, and otherwise. You need to examine and heal the wounds you have buried deep inside. This really is NO easy task. This is the part that is the most painful and time consuming. It is also the most necessary. A lot of people try to skip this step.

I have found that if you try to skip this step, you tend to be consumed by the rage that you suppress and you never do heal nor can you ever truly progress. It is more like walking in deep dark circles. Some people try to convince themselves they are changing and healing because the scenery changes as they move in orbit around the circle, but eventually if they are honest with themselves, they realize that they are circling back around and nothing is healing and nothing is changing. I walked that circle for way too many years!

Back to the point I suppose, you know you have finally begun to heal and let go when you see and sense the negativity in others. When you have let go of enough of your own, you are no longer drawn to it and begin to recognize it when it is near. You begin to be able to distinguish between the truly negative and the situationally negative. We are all human and we all have moments that get us down. We all lose our sight for a moment or two here or there. The important thing is not to take up residence there. Feel it. Examine it. Learn from it. Let it go.

I know that I am growing spiritually and can gauge that growth oddly enough by the blessings I receive and the blessings I bestow. Like that creepy lady from when I was a child. I find myself daily leaving blessings on and for my friends and for strangers. I also find myself receiving blessings. I like this, unlike when I was was a child. It is truly an honor now to receive the blessings of others. What a wonderful gift that really is! The perfect example is one from the other evening. I had been doing tarot readings and anyone who knows about tarot knows that it draws from your own personal energy stash. I had many people signing up left and right for tarot readings and I could not keep up. I had offered 10 and had at least 30 sign up. One of my patrons sent a message inquiring if it were alright to come back for a second reading as she had had one the month before.

Firstly, I thought to myself, how very kind and generous of her to understand that this is a gift I am giving by doing these for free. My second thought was, how considerate of her to realize that I am giving of myself in order to help others. I had already done my limit of 10 readings for that night, and then some. I sent her a message explaining that yes, it was alright for her to ask further guidance and that I was so grateful she asked. I also informed her that I had already done my readings for that evening but if she signed up and sent me an inbox message I would definitely honor her request within a day or two. To my surprise she replied by thanking me for all of my time and effort and then blessed me with the energy needed for the wonderful gift that I had been sharing. This woman instantly gave back to me a good portion of what I had already spent with just kind words. Funny how that works isnt it? Those kind words not only rejuvenated me, but left with me a sense of ease. After reading for this lady a few days later, I felt the need to repay the blessing she had bestowed on me and offered additional consultation on her reading and access to resources that she was unaware of.

Isn't it remarkable how one kind deed can cause a tidal wave of kindness? It is also with negativity. So if you are going to cause a storm, why not a rain storm? Why not let it pour love and compassion?  Why just get wet when you could actually be dancing in the rain?